WORST HALLOWEEN COSTUMES OF ALL TIME
When I was growing up, most of the kids in my neighborhood were fairly uncreative. Instead of thinking long and hard about what you wanted to be for Halloween, you'd run with your parent to the store at the last minute, and grab a prepackaged plastic costume of some famous character. Superheroes, Monsters, and Star Wars characters were usually the favorites, but every now and then you came across a few gems that really made you scratch your head.
Take this Father Murphy costume for example. I suppose you could have drawn a swastika on the forehead and passed yourself off as Charles Manson, but being that nobody under 60 years of age even watched this show, it makes you wonder what kid actually asked to be this.
Sure, the Sweat Hogs were all fairly popular in their day, but to think some poor 7 year old kid was wandering the streets dressed up as Gabe Kaplan is a crying shame.
Something tells me this Robert "Baretta" Blake costume would be far scarier if worn this Halloween than when it was originally released in the 70s. Get your buddy to dress as OJ Simpson, and you'd be the scariest duo out there!
Here's another one that just defies explanation. Sure, The Gong Show was popular beyond belief in the 70s, but to think that a kid would want to be Chuck Barris for Halloween defies all logic. My parents were pretty cheap, so I just had to put a bag over my head and be The Unknown Comic (just kidding). I'd actually love to have this costume now, though, something oddly cool about it.
You had to be completely brain dead to wear this outfit. You're just asking to get your candy stolen, and be beaten within an inch of your life when you're dressed up as Scott Baio.
Wouldn't you just love to throw sardines in the bag of a kid that showed up at your door wearing this? There's just something freakish about a dolphin with arms and legs running about asking for candy. It's like some experiment gone horribly wrong.
If you were even tempted to go the Flipper route, why not at least trade up to the JAWS costume? It's certainly scarier, and as far as I know, it's the only kid's costume ever made with a naked woman swimming across the top. (made you look)
How many poor kids that got stuck with this one had to hear, "Hey Rubik, how about if I rearrange your face?" This very well may be the least popular costume of all time.
AAAAIIIIEEE! And I thought Herve Villachaze was the freakiest little costume ever made. Other than Gary, it'd be a SMALL WONDER if a kid wanted to be this for Halloween (Get it! Hee hee!). It looks like she's dancing in a microwave.
How pathetic was the poor little girl that chose to be the lamer half of Laverne and Shirley? This is like to asking to be Rhoda or Maude for Halloween.
I suspect that "Mommy I want to be Atari's Asteroids Game for Halloween" was only slightly less creepy for parents to hear than, "Mommy, I just chopped up Fido with a shovel!"
What kid didn't want to be "Leather Guy" from The Village People? I suppose this might have been several kids second choice after the Richard Simmons costumes were sold out (wait . . . I was Richard Simmons for Halloween a few years ago)!
5 comments:
Brings back memories. I would have loved to have worn ANY of those costumes. I never got to have one of those cool, plastic costumes. I had to have creative, home made ones. The horror!
I can't believe no one else has commented!! This was a great post. Make a comment, you losers! We know you have been looking. Yeah Sugarbitches ... that means you!
what do you have against costumes Mike. Wahwee no comments on mine either. so don't feel to bad for Mike.
Hey, I loved Joanie loves Chachi. . . Although I always thought Chachi was way cuter than Joanie. But Joanie did have a lot of personality. . . Actually, I always hated the platic faces heads. No one ever really wore them for more than a few seconds. (pathetically random. . . I know)
GREAT POST! I didn't realize you'd finally updated! I'm so far behind! I was the opposite of Wahwee. I hated those plastic costumes. I always felt sorry for the kids whose uncreative parents made them wear them. We were lucky to have an uber creative Mom who always made us look good. We were generally some sort of fairy princess thing. I can't believe they made some of those costumes for serious. What stupid kid said to his Mom, "Mom can't I PLEASE be Chuck Barris for Halloween?!!". On a side note, Chachi WAS way cuter than Joannie. She was downright homely when she grew up. I hear she went all religious nutso.
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